I get a few goose bumps every time someone subscribes to my blog. The ‘slightly terrified’ kind of goose bumps, because I’m thinking, okay – what do I have to offer this person? Won’t I just bore them to sleep as I they peruse my pages? Oh, crap!
Don’t get me wrong, a good feeling accompanies the goose-bumps, too. A feeling of ‘oh, good!’ Thing is, I’ve read all styles of blogs, some really superb, others very interesting and some so eye-opening. Each tells a unique story, each teaches me something new, and most I’ve read were certainly worth each minute in one way or another. Some are actually daunting in there superb-ness! All so different from mine.
So I worry a little. But only a little. That’s probably only because being a perfectionist, I always worry about producing a good piece of work – more than good really. 70% in a school exam was never good enough for me, it sent me home wistful. I didn’t want to PASS, I wanted to excel. Of course after a playful semester sometimes what I honestly, desperately prayed for was to ‘just pass.’ Still what I really wanted was to excel, but hey, you don’t reap chicken after sowing beans.
Even in my blogging, which is a no-pressure, fun thing I still worry about producing a good piece of work! In reading around, I’ve realised it’s not just me. Good to know I have some company.
Amidst the ‘what do I have to offer this subscriber’ I stop fretting. ‘Cause I know variety is the spice of life, there’s nothing to prove, and ‘… Above all things to thine own self be true …’ And then I go on happily blogging away, and thinking ‘you’re a silly girl some days, y’know.’
My blog is my home. And like one wise woman said in a movie I loved, ‘a home is a place for self-expression not a place for making good impressions.’ Ha. Of course it would be great to make a good impression while ‘self-expressing.’ Plus, don’t some people in certain lines of work take their clients/potential clients home just so they/their wives can impress them (the clients) with their hosting, rich wine, et cetera so they can be brought around to sign a good deal or two? There are people who take people to their homes just for the purpose of impressing them with something or other, and it’s perfectly normal. And okay.
Anyway, enough with the rambling, my confession is made and I’m off to write a new post. Happy blogging, friends.